Bedding solutions for the oft-bedbound
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I have been waking up quite sore because my mattress, which is old, is not designed to withstand someone lying in it almost 24/7 and has become very squishy and sunken. My back is not being supported at all.
I'm wondering if anyone has recommendations for a bedding solution that can survive the kind of wear and tear we impose on it. I spend most of my time either sitting on or lying in bed.
I'm not very heavy, prefer hard surfaces, and have almost considered replacing my bed with a thick blanket directly on the floor but I don't think my partner would appreciate that
Things I've considered are: a futon, a thin folding mattress of some kind, or a hospital bed (though I would like to avoid the latter if possible). I don't think we are allowed to recommend specific products here but feel free to send me a private message if there's a brand or something you like!
Pronouns: they/them - ME/CFS since 2017
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@river Interesting query! I'm not much a use, but a good new mattress is likely to be a delight. I had a futon for a while (before they started putting foam middles in them) and found it too hard.
Here is a link to Choice articles in case you haven't seen them.
https://www.choice.com.au/home-and-living/bedroom/mattresses
Some might be behind a paywall, but "How to buy the best mattress" isn't.It is important to me to have a comfy sofa to lie down on too, as I am mostly there during the day, and in bed at night (in the hope that will help me to sleep better
)Good luck. My mattress is getting old, so I am keen to hear how you go.
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@dot I had a futon for a long time as well (no foam) and loved it. But they are so heavy and difficult to move...
Pronouns: they/them - ME/CFS since 2017
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@river Come to think of it, lugging it around was a big part of deciding to get rid of it! It needed turning over every so often. Eep.
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@dot yeah, I would have to get someone else to do that
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@river I have a T….r (in case we can’t say the brand) mattress. Very expensive so I could only afford to get the single. But it’s very good, and gives very good support.. it moulds into your body but feels firm. My only complaint is when the weather gets cold the mattress firms up so I get sore hips, so it would be better where there’s a warmer climate.
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@glimmer please send me the brand name and mattress type in private message!
So, I found a place selling a futon that is very thin (only 7cm) and can be rolled up, and weighs less than 15kg. That is half the weight of a basic spring mattress I was looking at before. I think it might work quite well for me, aside from the inevitable need to flip it, which I could get a carer to do at the same time they change sheets etc.
Has anyone tried something similar? -
@river I can’t seem to get my personal message to work. (possibly the brain). Perhaps if you message first then I could link on.
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@river I was in the same boat last year and ended up buying a Sleep R**&#ic mattress in a box, which is part memory foam, part tiny springs. It's a firm mattress that has made a significant difference to my pain levels and seems to withstand constant use.
I also got a 'zero gravity foam wedge system' for day use that I often leave set up on my mattress for postural support while doing activities, then roll out of it as needed. I am lucky enough to have a king-sized bed to myself to support this method, though...
If I was to spend the money again, I'd consider an adjustable bed.
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I ended up getting the futon I mentioned before, its from a place called Back To The Futon - may as well say that now I know we're allowed to mention brands.
Deciding factors for me were price (about $300 including shipping) and weight/portability (folded up in its packaging I was able to move it by myself, I'd estimate it's about 10kg maybe a little more - a far cry from the heavy spring mattresses).
I also wasn't too sure about whether I'd like the "bounce" of a spring mattress, I am super sensitive to motion and vibration and have had issues with metal bed frames where I can feel my own pounding heartbeat reverberating through the frame! So I was scared of the springs. The futon is just foam and cotton, so no moving parts to wear out or cause motion sensitivity issues.I got it yesterday and have only slept on it one night, so a bit early to judge, but I think I like it.
- The futon itself is soft, but squashes down a lot and becomes very thin, making it feel firm.
- My upper back no longer feels like its sinking into quicksand, and my whole spine feels like it's being stretched out and straightened.
- The downside of this is my lumbar area is less supported and hurts a little, but I'm hoping this will improve as I adjust to actually having a straight spine again.
- It seems to retain temperatures, which can be good or bad - I've been putting ice packs on it and then it's nice and cool to lie on afterwards. But it was delivered on a 38 degree day and took some time to cool down after being brought inside. I didn't feel too hot while sleeping on it but I wouldn't want to put this futon somewhere that gets direct sunlight
I have the futon directly on the floor atm and I am using a neck supportive pillow (see pic). My tolerance for this kind of pillow varies but it feels like the best choice for this futon.
Pronouns: they/them - ME/CFS since 2017
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@river Lovely. I hope last night went well too!
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@dot yes I had my best sleep in ages
Pronouns: they/them - ME/CFS since 2017
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@river Hooray, that is the best news.
With me, a good sleep gives everything else a chance to start improving. I do hope the same is true for you. -
@river My sister has trouble with temp regulation and I found this link on an ME group recently for a cooling mat for sleep. She's been researching others from that and there are lot available.
A friend who lives in an apartment without aircon also said she is getting some pet cooling mats for her to sleep on after they worked well for her dog. She got them at Pet Barn but says they are at Kmart too.
Could be something else to try because you said you were really struggling with PEM in the heat.
Yay for a good sleep on your new futon though!
She/her
Diagnosed Jan 2022 -
@emsarah great idea but I won't buy things off amazon - would love to try something like this if you can get them locally though
Pronouns: they/them - ME/CFS since 2017
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@river it was just a starting point of research rather than saying that specific one is good. I think the pet mats that I said are similar and like I said can be bought at pet Barn or Kmart. Sorry if that was unclear.
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Revisiting this thread I just want to add a little disclaimer and word of warning...
I mention moving the 10kg futon by myself...
Don't do that, please don't do that, get someone to help you.
Especially if it's a 38 degree day and you have no air conditioning.
That event single handedly propelled me into severe ME/CFS territory. I have not recovered.
(I say single handedly, it was definitely the trigger, but there was a lot of other stuff accumulating that led up to it... Even without that though, I think the same thing would have happened)
